"Oh dear, I've expressed your cat's anal gland juices all over your purse."
My silly and annoying little cat has been "scooting" his butt on my carpet intermittently for the past few days. Also yecch! When I called the office, they said, have you seen worms in his feces?" Ewwww, no: yecchh! So I made an appointment to bring him in and have the vet deal with him.
Luckily, or perhaps strangely, nothing was wrong --- no redness, no infection, no mites or worms or fleas. And she said he was "full," but not "impacted," so he might have solved or partially solved whatever was bothering him on his own with the scooting. Scooting, yecch!
Oh, he meowed and meowed when we were in the waiting room this morning. At least the vet showered him with the luvs while we were there (not that poor little Loquito was happy about it ---- many other unpleasant things happened in there!).The vet cooed about how big and heavy he was, but not at all fat, and said many things in a silly voice about his cuteness, his adorable soft coat, and how she would just take him home herownself if she had half a chance. Heh. And hey, since nobody was prodding at my butt, I thought it was a good visit.
I read on the internet, though, that in older cats this becomes a problem and sometimes you have to take the cat in to the vet regularly to be "expressed" or learn how to do it at home. Yecch! Listen, Mr: you can just express yourself as far as I'm concerned! And you better start looking for a job too, if you're going to need extra vet visits regularly --- to say nothing of paying to have the carpet cleaned occasionally!
Speaking of looking for jobs, I have uploaded/sent/emailed about 6 jobs, so I'm now going to celebrate by folding my laundry and taking a nap. Who knows, maybe I'll have a bidding war over me by the time I wake up. Or at the very least, I can awaken with the knowledge that my cat isn't swabbing his but all over everything.