Today's to do list:
clean up fridge and make meal plan
Hmm, that seemed more impressive at the time. Maybe I should list the three loads of laundry each on their own line. Except that they didn't really take long per se. And yes, I cleaned up everything except the dishes --- cleaned around them in fact! So? It's my apartment! And if I had tried to force myself to wash them I probably would have done nothing today. I tell you, the only good thing about doing dishes is after scrubbing about three things I have the sudden desire to actually finish another job app. I've been trying to play my competing work loathings off each other, with some success; I have a lot of job stuff finished and even more that is all ready to take to school and pilfer some letterhead and envelopes.
I probably don't have a chance in hell for these jobs as they are actually comp jobs that ask for an English rather than a comp/rhet degree, but, whaddaya gonna do? I'm sending off everything I can in the hopes that my cumulative effort somehow appeases the job gods and they bestow some sort of work upon me.
And my life became immeasurably better when I let a couple postdoc deadlines just pass by. Being miserable for four or five hours at a time without actually producing anything usable for the app is just pointless. Whereas when I put in that much time on my book project I was both happy and getting a lot done. Sure, I wouldn't mind living in Chicago for a while, but you know what? University of Chicago writing postdoc, you can just suck it! You and Stanford's glorified TA program can both kiss my ass! I don't need to write a fucking essay right now about how I would teach your list of texts from the Metamorphosis to A Room of One's Own in a way calculated to stand out from the other 900 applicants you're gonna get. PS you misspelled "Woolf" on your website, you douches.
Ahhhhhhh. You wouldn't believe how much better I feel now that I've written that out! I think I could actually face writing a paragraph about how I use technology in my student-centered classroom now. At least it's for a fucking permanent job.