Sunday, March 13, 2011

Window Shopping Again

Hello. I got an email from zappos (a rare occurrence) informing me that I needed to buy new shoes and that "nude" shoes were all the rage for this season. I immediately went over to Modcloth and started looking at all their shoes that were loud colors. Because there is nothing that puts me off faster than people telling me I should like a certain something. Anyway, I've never liked "nude" color unless you are buying some capezios for your Broadway auditions and need some character shoes. And the big shiny nude patent ones I've been seeing remind me of that thing the ice skaters are doing where they try to make their legs look longer by pulling their tights down over their skates. Bleah! They just look like they have hooves instead.

You are probably reading right now and going "how the hell did an academic blog get hijacked by one of the writers of Go Fug Yourself?" What can I say? Instead, I will just post shoe pictures and complain. (Now, complaining ---- that's something I'm known for!)

Why did I not buy those shiny carrot-orange patent pumps when I linked to them that one time! Alas I cannot find anything since that is as cool! There are some bright yellow ones I am considering on zappos, though, except that I am dubious about the peep toes and the highness of the heel.

I am also still looking for green, because I feel like it is spring and I should be wearing green all the time. But I still haven't found a pair I really love --- this is ok, and I found another strappy pair, but didn't like the way it was pierced with holes to create a sorta ostrich-skin texture.

Ok, you may be thinking this is nude. but the two-tone means that actually it is brown. "Nude" is that obnoxious non-color all the starlets were wearing at the Oscars that was pretty much but not really their skin color, and just made the entire thing washed out and uninteresting. (If you actually look like you are naked, then maybe it's interesting in a shock-value kind of way, but otherwise, there's no sort of interesting contrast between dress and skin.) With these, I like the funky retro wing-tip look, but again, the holes punched in it are just off-putting. They are not on my pro list, ever. Perhaps I could over come my hole-aversion if I got these shoes, or perhaps not. Hmm.
And these are kinda fabulous. Like feet corsets. But, hopefully not so painful. Hmm, what would I wear them with? They look like they would be too buried under black pants. I do have black dresses and skirts, but, I dunno. I want some sort of more "oomph" to the whole outfit. This is what I'm talking about when I complain that I will buy a piece and it will not mesh with the rest of my wardrobe. (Though in that last post I was actually complaining about having either stuff that is busy that wants to go together or boring-on-boring that wants to go together.)
These, also cute but I think I would not buy them unless I had money left over after the various other shoetacular expenditures. And actually I don't have money for even a first shoetacular expenditure right now. This is the advantage of window blogging shopping.
And this, this is fabulous and yet, just not going to work for me. This is what I mean by a statement piece that I wouldn't want to wear too often, because it is so memorable, and then what do I wear to work if I have shoes in the closet that I can't wear so often? And we're also back with the problem of I don't want to pair this with a crazy patterned dress or top, so I'd buy a bunch of very plain things that I think would go, and then I look through my closet and only have boring-boring-boring instead of a nice contrast of boring-plus-statement pieces.

Now, in the category of something completely different (for I notice modcloth has a very similar set of silhouettes on their site right now, the retro/40s look I gravitate to), I will show you these from White House Black Market!

Oooh, shiiii-ny. I love the patent, I love how it's red, but a darker, rust or blood red, and I love the cuts because they add just enough interest without me worrying how I would match it to other parts of an outfit that also have some sort of interesting detail. And did you see it is shiny? Drool. The heel is kinda holding me back, though ---- did I mention five flights of stairs and no elevator in my building? Plus, if I'm not parking in the faculty lot that fills up by 8 am, I have quite a ways to hike, and rough concrete really tears up a delicate heel like that. Particularly if you are heel-challenged and fall down a lot. No, no, of course I have no personal experience with that.

Also, I keep trying to go for Modcloth dresses and get warned away in the buyers' reviews. No, I like how there are customer reviews --- it's a good thing. But it's clear that the vast majority of Modcloth's dresses are cut at a weird miniskirt or less length, and that's just not teaching-appropriate for me. Many's the dress I have salivated over, or just looked at going, hmm could I try something new and different, and then noticed the skirt length is one that people my height have complained about before. So, can anyone recommend other sites/companies that have cute dresses that are not too short and young? But also not Banana Republic because they are all pure silk and $200 dollars and that's not really going to work for teaching clothes either?


Anonymous said...

dude, I am soooo with you on the nude shoes. I think of the ice skating thing whenever I see them and then I think I must be hopelessly unstylish for not getting it.

Dr. Koshary said...

Really? You're even thinking of a spike heel for a work shoe? Do you have a postdoc at Vogue? (Of course, I'd look extraordinarily risible trying to walk around in heels, at work or otherwise, so perhaps I'm biased.)

On a side note, if you ever feel like taking a break from your growing body of work on Fruit Studies, you might think about a puff piece on how obnoxious it is that people still use the phrase 'nude' to refer to people's skin color as an unmarked reference point. O ye gods, is there any aspect of the fashion industry that does not anger me?

Sisyphus said...

Kosh, didn't I mention that the heel height was holding me back from buying them??? I think the highest heel I own is 2 1/2 inches. (And I've been teaching in my boots or my wellies for weeks now!)

I almost wrote about the "nude"=skin point you make, because Hallie Berry wore a "nude" dress to one of the Oscar things and it *did* match her skin tone, so it was quite a bit darker than what other women were wearing. So I think the fashion industry has become ever so slightly aware of that point, just making ugly dresses right now. ----- In fact, I think Berry would have looked *better* in a pinky-white "nude" dress than one that was pretty much her skin tone ---- I want *contrast* dammit!

No wait, I want *colors* on my Oscar dresses! Get some more reds and blues and greens!

Susan said...

So the other trick is to do the NY working girl thing, and carry your great heals in your bag, and wear sneakers (or some other flat shoe) to walk from the parking lot.

I love the peacock shoe, and it matches a dress I may buy for a wedding this summer. But I am cheap, and I don't think this is a pair of shoes I would wear twice.

rented life said...

The peacock show and the green shoe are totally ones I would buy if I wasn't broke. And I'd wear the peacock shoe twice, but that's because I don't ever tire of getting comments on my more unique fashion choices. :)